Through emotional healing, you may be able to improve your emotional intelligence, also called your emotional quotient, or EQ.

Emotional intelligence can be defined as the ability to recognize, identify, and manage your feelings. Someone who has emotional intelligence is cognizant of their own emotional state, even if it’s one of sadness, frustration, stress or anger. When you’re emotionally intelligent, you can identify your feelings and manage them, but you can also tune into the emotions of others.

Emotional intelligence and emotional healing go hand-in-hand. When you go through something difficult, the more emotionally intelligent you are, the better equipped you might be to handle that hardship and your own emotional healing. People who are emotionally intelligent may be better leaders, better parents, better friends, and better relationship partners than those who are not.

Experts generally agree that emotional intelligence encompasses at least three crucial skills:

  • You’re aware of your feelings: You can name, identify, and recognize your emotions.
  • You manage your feelings: You can regulate your feelings and help others do the same.
  • You have empathy: You can identify how others feel, and you consider those feelings as a guiding factor in what you say and do (both personally and professionally).
  • You have internal motivation: Rather than working simply for praise or reward, you work toward self-gratification — because of the way you feel when you achieve something. When your motivation comes from within, you may be more focused on and committed to your goal.

Measuring Emotional Intelligence

There is no psychologically validated scale for measuring emotional intelligence the way IQ is measured. It’s more of a set of social, communication, and interpersonal skills. However, based on the belief that more emotionally intelligent people might make better leaders or better workers, many employers will administer emotional intelligence tests to prospective employees, which are designed to indicate how emotionally “smart” they might be.

Why Emotional Intelligence is Important

Have you ever dealt with someone who made you feel like you were talking to a brick wall? Someone who never seemed to understand how you feel and just didn’t seem to “get it”? Most of us have had people like this in our lives. Maybe you thought they weren’t very smart, or they just weren’t a good listener. But perhaps they just didn’t have the level of emotional intelligence that you have.

It could be argued that life is really about relationships. We are born into family relationships. We connect emotionally with friends. We must form business relationships in order to succeed at work. Without a level of emotional intelligence, these relationships would be extremely difficult to form, let alone gain satisfaction or productivity from. While IQ or intelligence is important, how meaningful or successful could our lives be on intelligence alone?

As Theodore Roosevelt famously said, “No one cares how much you know until they know how much you care.”

Emotional intelligence may be critical to both our physical and mental health and well-being. We draw on our emotional intelligence to inspire or care for others. We use it to lead others in worthwhile pursuits. Without emotional intelligence, we could never maintain the relationships we need to be happy, and emotional healing would be impossible. We couldn’t resolve conflict. We wouldn’t be able to forgive, form lasting friendships, or make deep connections with others.

Fortunately, with a little work emotional intelligence can be improved. In our next few articles, we’ll talk about ways to enhance emotional intelligence. Until then, we’d love to hear what you think about the importance of emotional intelligence and the part it plays in your life, especially in relation to using The Emotion Code® and The Body Code™.